You have to get your head in gear to hit the stores at 4 AM on Black Friday
I know women who coordinate their Black Friday shopping with their family. They plot and plan which section of what store they’ll hit first. They’ve been doing it for years and they’ve got it down to a science. Then there are people like me: You kinda want an incredible bargain, but the idea of standing outside a store at 0 dark thirty, then trampling grandma to get the sale makes you a little queasy.
I did some thinking and came up with a pretty fool proof plan on how to shop on Black Friday.
1. Sign up for ad scans and sales alerts from BlackFriday.com, GottaDeal.com, and BFAds.net with an email address you created just for their newsletters. Promptly forget user name and password. Go back to sites, re-sign up using your regular email.
2. Make plans with friends to shop Black Friday together. Remember, there’s always safety in numbers.
3. Make a list of everyone you’re giving a gift to this year. Go through the sites to find bargains that will be terrific for every person. Lose list. Start list again. Lose list again. Toss out pad and paper, write list on computer. Vow to print it out before you leave the house.
4. Start speed walking sessions. You want to make sure you’re not exhausted by the time you hit “your” aisle.
5. Make Thanksgiving dinner. Do NOT eat any turkey at dinner. Turkey makes you sleepy. If you’re sleepy at dinner, you won’t get up when the alarm goes off at 1 AM.
6. Sleep in your Black Friday shopping clothes; you don’t want to waste any time when you wake up.
7. Luckily you filled the coffee maker earlier during TDay dinner. You flip the on switch, then call everyone else to make sure they’re awake and ready to go. Pour coffee in a thermal mug and get out of town.
8. Pick up everyone. Share your coffee with the sleepiest member. Park as close as you can to the front door. Realize you desperately have to pee. Thanks coffee. Debate standing inline for store to open so you can use their bathroom, or doing the crouch and squat behind the car.
9. The doors open, you hit the ground running and regret not picking up knee and elbow pads. So this is what playing football feels like.
10. Once inside the store, you realize that your holiday shopping list is home. Still on the computer. Try to remember who needed what and keep on shopping.
11. After you leave the store, you realize that you’ve bought a lot of presents for yourself. Try to figure out if there’s anything you can use as a gift.
12. Resolve to do the rest of your holiday shopping online.